Anal hair stylist Paulson finds out that Europe is suffering from the subprime meltdown, high oil prices and the like

Anal hair stylist supremo and US secretary of the Treasury is a busy man today. He's always on the road. He's become a moving target, not easy to hit. You see him clinking glasses of good cheer in Asia or looking sappy at meetings in Europe. Now the anal hair stylist has, o miracles, Europe is in economic doldrums albeit not as bad as the US. Paulson is traveling so much it takes his mind--what little there is of it--from problems at home of which he's klewless, and has little idea of how to remedy them. Put a cup of whisky in his hand and he's in his element, a back slapper and glass eyed with cheer. As the US economy tanks, the dollar so anemic and anorexic you wonder if ever will live to see another day, the anal hair stylist continues with insouciance on his appointed rounds of far' niente...do nothingism which excels at. Send the man to boot camp, and let him peel a mountain of potatoes for he might go well at that?